The Gang's All Here!

The Gang's All Here!

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

The Game Changer

First off, the bike race went so well! YSC had a great turnout, and other than it being in the '40's that morning, we had a blast. I am so thankful for our wonderful family and friends! Thanks again to all of you for your love and support!

With that said, go on and grab yourself a bottle of wine and maybe some cheese to go with it. You're going to need it for the this little gem of a blog post.

So... in case you hadn't heard through the very active grapevine, I'm pregnant. Whew, there I said it, finally. Yup, you read that correctly, P-R-E-G-N-A-N-T. At this moment I realize you are either chugging wine, laughing hysterically or saying repeatedly, "what the hell!?!?". Or, more likely, you're doing all three. How pregnant am I? Um, all the way pregnant I guess? Someone asked me that the other day and I was like, well, I don't think there's a half pregnant option? I am 20 weeks along, so half baked!

I'm happy to tell you that baby is doing great and is measuring right on target at 20 weeks. All genetic testing has come back perfect, so fingers crossed things keep going smoothly. To answer your burning question, N-O, this baby was not planned and very much a surprise. We were told on several different occasions that the chances of me having another baby were slim and very risky, were I to actually get pregnant. We would likely have had to go through fertility treatments etc. Chemo wreaks havoc on the reproductive system as I'm sure you can imagine.We were perfectly happy with our family of four. So, you can imagine my COMPLETE shock when I found out I was pregnant. I want to emphasize that we were very much NOT trying to get pregnant, as I knew pregnancy would be a risk to both myself and a baby. And yet, here we are. It has become increasingly evident to me that sometimes, life is just out of our hands. We've decided to run with the surprise theme and will not be finding out the sex until March, when baby arrives.

How am I doing? Cancer-wise, I am fine. I was still on the Herceptin when I got pregnant, but we stopped it immediately and it has had no impact on the baby. My blood work has been perfect and will continue to be monitored throughout my pregnancy. My oncologist was shocked at the news, but then remembered that nothing with me is ever "normal" ;) Physically, I feel like CRAP. By now I'm sure you've noticed my lagging in keeping up with blog posts. That's mainly because for many, many weeks, it was all I could do to get through the day making sure both Stella and Simon were alive. The all day nausea, exhaustion and headaches have really kicked my ass. Of course, this is much more exaggerated for me, because I didn't feel bad at all with either of my pregnancies. So, karma, it really does exist. My deepest, sincerest sympathies to anyone having to endure morning (all day) sickness. For me, I have felt far worse this pregnancy than I ever did on chemo. But, it could always be worse, and as long as baby is doing well, I will endure.

I've really had to do some soul searching these past few months. Emotionally, I've been struggling coming to terms with stopping treatment and bringing another baby into our family. My number one concern is the health and well-being for this baby. And yes, of course my health is a huge factor in all of this. But, despite the complexity of everything we're facing, y'all, I'm pregnant! This baby is truly a miracle and one of the greatest symbols of hope I can imagine. I feel like I've been given a chance to start fresh, a new life to love and cherish. Who could ever ask for more than that?    

Friday, October 17, 2014

Tour de Pink

It's hard to believe, but the Atlanta Tour de Pink event is next weekend, October 25!! Our team, When Irish Chicks Are Fighting will be biking to help raise money in the fight against breast cancer via the Young Survival Coalition. This is an amazing organization dedicated to helping women under the age of 40 with breast cancer. While tremendous strides have been made in treating women with breast cancer, we still have a long way to go in terms of fighting back and winning this war. Please consider making a donation to help in the effort to expand breast cancer research, treatment and education for all of those battling breast cancer.

Thank you so much for all of your support, kindness and encouragement throughout my own personal journey battling breast cancer. I feel so incredibly humbled and grateful to be able to share my story with all of you, to be able to say "I BEAT CANCER!!". How's that for some serious kickass motivation?!?!

Here are some links to the Atlanta Tour de Pink event and our team page.

                **ATL Tour de Pink: link to the event page. You can find out more about the YSC and                           fundraising efforts here

                 **When Irish Chicks are Fighting:  This is our team page!

Thank you!!

Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Exasperation: I Admit it!

I'm still here, promise. I just honestly haven't had much time to myself, let alone time to type, uninterrupted, in weeks. All, is mostly well, I'm just having trouble keeping up with my life these days.

We seem to be lacking in the sleep department lately. If it isn't one kid up at three a.m., it's the other, needing necessary things like water, a story (I mean, really?) or a tissue. Because, you know, it's not a problem for either child to come busting out of their room every five seconds during "nap" time, but during the night? No siree, it's much more effective to start screaming in the middle of night, waking up mom or dad from a dead sleep. Oh, and if, god forbid, BOTH children sleep through the night, the damn dogs are up at three a.m. barfing or needing to go outside. Never mind the fact that we took them out right before we went to bed...

So yeah, I'm a little grumpy and exasperated these days. Simon is testing me on virtually every level possible. Everything is a battle or negotiation. I'm living with a three foot tall dictator. Just now, he's sitting here on the floor of the office screaming his head off because I asked/ told/ begged him not to touch the computer. And, he turned the computer off, rendering everything I had just typed lost in space. Awesome. A battle of wills would be an understatement. It's everything from I poured the cereal wrong (in case your were not aware that there is a correct way to pour cereal...), to the dog licking his shoe (this is a HORRIBLE offense), or asking him to brush his teeth (god help us all). I am drained.

Stella, on the other hand, would be perfectly satisfied if she never had to deal with me again. Everyday I receive a diatribe on the ways that I'm ruining her life. For example, brushing her hair is akin to an attack on national security (a big, freaking deal). Asking her to put on her shoes? An exercise in negotiations for world peace. We won't even discuss what asking her to pick up her toys entails because I get hives just thinking about it. Oh, and right after I had cleaned the kitchen today? She found a bag of cornmeal and proceeded to dump the entire bag all over my freshly cleaned kitchen. Murphy was helping when I walked in from using the restroom...

I know this isn't a super, upbeat post, but honestly? I'm beat. Can someone please tell me that it gets better???? Obviously, I love my children and a lot of the time I spend with them, but wow, days like this (or weeks, in this case) are tough to swallow. Thanks for letting me vent!

And, Murphy just dragged a dead animal into my house. GAH! Tootles...