Death by Minivan

I know, I know, the title of this post is overly dramatic and whiny. You can also probably tell just by reading the title that this is going to be rant and not a rave. So, here it is and you're welcome in advance ;)

It's been a crappy week since I last updated the blog. Steve's car was in the shop while we were at the beach (I won't even attempt to get into that mess, let's just say the car needs some serious work) and of course it wasn't ready when we returned. So, like any normal return trip for the beach (NOT), we swung by the airport so Steve could pick up a rental car. He was hoping for some sort of earth friendly vehicle that takes diet gas (aka: good gas mileage). On a side note, both of our cars are gas guzzlers to the extreme. He thought the rental would be a good experiment to see how much money we could save by driving a car with better gas mileage. Well, those rental cars are like a million dollars a week, so he ended up with a Dodge Charger. Man, that thing was ugly. It was a neon blue color with racing stripes. Finally, the middle of last week, we picked up his car and he decided rather than shell out $1,000 to have the mechanic fix his car, he'd do it himself. Wonderful...

That brings us to Friday. On Wednesday, I went to start my car and all hell broke loose. The check engine light came on along with about 45 other indicator lights (not really, but it felt like it). Steve checked the codes and assured me I could drive it safely and without doing further damage. There was something wrong with the emissions system pump (or something like that, I don't really know - car mechanics are really not my forte). On Friday morning, I went to start the car, which it did, but not happily. As we started to drive through the neighborhood, I noticed that I had the accelerator almost floored and we were going less than 25pmh. Obviously not a good sign. I guess whatever was wrong with the car threw it into something called "limp mode" which is basically a protective mode to prevent you (me) from doing further damage to the car. Awesome. So, Steve drove home from work to help me drop off the car at a different mechanic, play musical car seats (one of my MOST favorite games! oh, and holy freaking cheerios, by the way, it was like someone set off a cheerio bomb in my car) and pick up a rental car. Our second rental car in the same week. And oh, what a surprise he had for me...

Steve rented a minivan. He claims it was because we "needed the room" and he thought it "would be fun" to test it out. It's no secret regarding how I feel about minivans. First of all, I would have been happy with a sedan, especially given that I wouldn't have the rental that long. Secondly, Steve rented that thing just to torture me. I could go on, but I'll spare you! The kids were fascinated by the "magic" doors, especially Simon which was pretty funny to watch. Other than feeling like I was driving a cruise ship all weekend, we survived and I now have my car back ($3200 later but we won't go there right now). So between piloting a cruise ship, taking care of a husband who wasn't feeling well (ladies, you know what I mean here), and trying to accomplish what Steve and I normally get done together on a weekend by myself plus entertaining two toddlers (I want to play with DADDY, not you, MOMMY) and two wildly out of control dogs, I am pretty sure I had a taste of the 7th level of hell. Yup, pretty sure when it rains, it monsoons around here. If anyone would like to share a bit of this awesomeness, you just let me know ;).